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As I reflect on the Christmas celebrations of my childhood, I remember how magical the holiday felt. In the days leading up to Christmas, our family would gather for an evening of making gingerbread houses adorned with gumdrops and peppermint candies. We would recount the story of Christ’s birth, including the shepherds and wise men who followed a new star to find the Christ child. The scent of pine permeated our home from the tree we decorated together.
On Christmas Eve, we set out cookies for Santa before heading to bed. Because I grew up in a large family, Christmas morning was an incredible sight to see. I woke up to find presents galore filling the entire family room and Christmas tree lights twinkling and dancing in the dimly lit room. Santa would leave a stocking for each of us with an orange at the bottom and a giant peppermint candy cane sticking out from the top.
After cleaning up the crumpled wrapping paper and putting away presents, we would head to our grandparents’ home to enjoy time with extended family, only to return home later that evening to find Santa had made a second round, leaving more gifts under the tree. Each year, Santa’s second visit included a sketch pad and colored markers so that we could draw while our parents prepared banana splits for the family. Fuelled by these magical traditions, the anticipation for Christmas day kept us bubbling over with excitement.
Although I was unaware of the sacrifices made to create this magic, it was these family traditions that made Christmas special and created lasting family memories. Family traditions, whether for the holidays or other special occasions, knit families together, foster shared values, create cherished memories, and have a profound impact.
Creating family traditions or rituals can be both enjoyable and challenging. Here are some thoughts to consider when developing yours:
Define your family values. Your traditions should reflect your family's qualities, attitudes, and beliefs. Consider what makes your family unique and what your family enjoys doing. Traditions that align with your family’s interests and core vaues will be more meaningful and enjoyable for everyone. For example, if your family values health and fitness, going on a family hike could be a good tradition to add to your holidays.
Integrate spirituality. Traditions that include spiritual and religious practices, such as prayer, church, synagogue, or meanful teachings, are powerful tools that foster a collective intention and shared family purpose.
Be inclusive. Traditions in which the entire family participates can strengthen relationships and family bonds. Choose activities that ensure no one feels left out, regardless of age, ability, or limitations.
Incorporate activities that carry meaning. Consider any cultural, community, family, or personal significance a tradition may have. Using traditions passed down from your family of origin that make sense for your own individual family adds a continuum to your heritage and an extra layer of meaning. Community events are often easy to add to your family fun. When making drastic changes from the societal norm, discuss the “whys and hows” with your family.
Be willing to change. Be flexible and open to adapting traditions as your family grows and develops. What works well when children are young might need to evolve as they get older and as they build their own families. Note that it is important for new families to start their own traditions, so be supportive rather than refusing to change.
Accept feedback. Welcoming input helps to ensure that a tradition is something the entire family looks forward to and enjoys. Make it practical for everyone to participate. Be willing to accept feedback.
As you consider these suggestions and brainstorm ideas with your loved ones, you can start family traditions that bring joy, strengthen family ties, and create lasting memories.
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